There are times when we, or rather I, do not feel the presence of the Gods or spirits. There is a quiet emptiness which pervades the entire atmosphere of my existence. I feel as though I have plateaued in my spiritual journey. Have you ever felt like that?

Observing human nature and the tangled web of relationships, I have noticed there tends to be certain steps we are inclined to all take. Mind you, this is a generalization, not a scientific study. It’s just my observations. Yours will vary.

Step 1: Connection
The first step is connection. It’s not easy, and oftentimes just because one party feels that bond towards someone, it doesn’t mean that the other one feels the exact same way. When it comes to Neopaganism, Polytheism, and Witchcraft in general, I get the sensation that newbies (and this even happens with long timers) want to experience this entire open avenue of the Gods. They want to connect with something, or Someone. So they go looking for who might be the most interesting towards their endeavors. Is it Hekate? Apollon? Athena? Brighid? Pan? Lugh? The list goes on and on. Connection can be precarious, because if we are not careful in our approach, we may miss the mark on who is really trying to contact us.

I encourage folks to look at their main activities and seek out who may be their patron (matron is applicable to humans, not deities). For example, are you a mechanic or someone who works with welding? Hephaestus, Brighid, or Goibniu might do. Are you a student in the arts? Athena, the Muses, Dionysos, Isis, Hathor, Bast, or even Bragi are choices. The medical field? Apollon, Asklepios, Airmid, Dian Cecht, Isis, and Sekhmet are also possibilities.

Be that as it may, sometimes even a seeming connection you want with a certain deity won’t happen. Your prayers may feel hollow. You may get a gut instinct that something is blocking you from engaging with that deity. You won’t get any affirmations or dreams (which are tricky to begin with so don’t always rely on them). The solution? Usually seeking out a skilled diviner can help guide you a certain way. But once a connection is made, now we move on to the next step of the process.

Step 2: Enthusiasm
The honey moon phase. The time when we are excited to research our deity. We set up an altar or shrine. We look eagerly for icons and want to tell the world about the goodness of our deities. You make up your own prayers and/or use pre-written ones. You give offerings weekly…daily even. There is much to learn and you want to connect with others of like mind to share your excitement. There is nothing inherently wrong with this. Everyone deserves to feel loved, affirmed, and bonded with a higher power, if they believe it that is.

NOTE: There is nothing wrong with agnosticism or atheism. We all have our own journey.

Step 3: Dedication
This may or may not happen around Enthusiasm time. Usually it will blend, but not always. Dedicating yourself to the worship and work of a deity or spirit comes with responsibilities. In the human parallel, we decide to get to know our partner(s) and affirm our desires and listen to theirs. Still, you may live separately. Each one’s annoyances and clashes may be at a minimum. Things may not bother you as much. Dedicating yourself to a deity, to become their priest/ess, is fraught with danger. It is a major step, like you making the decision to move in with your partner(s). Now you’ve done it. It’s there. You are a partner. It’s real.

Step 4: Separation
I use the term “Separation” not just in the physical sense, but also the metaphysical. You may feel like there is a plateau: stable, but perhaps the little things are beginning to get to you and one another. In the human analogy, corporate stress between you two may lead to further disagreements. Growing anger may come between you two (or more), and it is up to each of you to make the step in reconciling. How does this translate to your growing relationship with a deity? Simple. At this stage, whether or not you have made a formal dedication to serve your deity or spirit, you get into a lot of problems. You’ll feel lost for a moment. You try to make offerings and prayers, but the words seem empty. You’re going through a lot of trials and tribulations. You feel this may be a test from your deity or spirit, and you begin to be afraid: will you fail and the deity will leave you? You’re having nightmares possibly. Your anxiety and depression come back. In short, the Enthusiasm is gone. You fear your spirituality was just a farce. A phase.

Step 5: Plateau 
This will probably blend in with Separation, but for simplicity’s sake, I categorize it separately. Plateauing takes place when our sadness turns inward at ourselves. Our altars or shrines begin to collect dust, or they are removed entirely. We become bored. Bored with life. And then the worst part can sneak in…apathy. We’re just tired. Why continue our worship and work when nothing is happening? There are no positive changes in our life? It’s just not worth it, we think. In addition, life is giving us enough issues and we don’t have the time to dedicate to them as much as we want. It just sounds even more exhausting. Whether we realize it or not, this is the part where we have to understand that when we are going through issues, their presence may be overwhelming. That’s right: the emotional thrill of the Gods’ presence may in fact be too dominating, and may turn our attention away from the work that needs to be done in our life towards seclusion. Our Gods are usually not ones to force seclusion or an ascetic lifestyle (certain ones may vary). We live. We breathe. We work. We survive. That is our lot. It isn’t a test. It’s life. We have to know how we are going to deal with these issues. Feeling an emotional and mental connection is great, but we can’t stay there. We have to know that we are not alone in our endeavors.

Step 6: Commitment
When we realize that life must go on, we then become more mature in how we deal with our religious obligations to the Gods and spirits while balancing life’s challenges. This leads to Commitment. Commitment is when we should now decide if we are going to be a priest/ess or a simple devotee. We shouldn’t make decisions when Enthusiasm is the predominating force in our lives. Like human marriage relationships in which there is a mature, mutual agreement to be committed to one another no matter the cost, that is the level of maturity we should explore. Ancient and modern folks, unless they were part of an established priesthood which was funded by the State (a different blog for another time), don’t always have time for private devotions lasting an hour or so. We have to rectify that. Gods and spirits tend to understand this situation way more than we care to admit. Some don’t, and that’s when we can let them know what the situation is and that’s that. Don’t be afraid to talk to your Gods or spirits. Despite what I have written, oftentimes we have to let them know that we are living a life, and they may need to back off from further responsibilities (which, ironically, may be the ones we put on ourselves in Enthusiasm stage).

Lesson: Be careful with your words.

Conclusion
These 6 steps may not always be perfectly separated, and may even bleed into one another. Nonetheless, it is important to examine our motives, our responsibilities, and our growth. It may take some time. Maybe months. Maybe years. Possibly decades. But these steps are pretty near-universal when it comes to our worship and our work. When we make do, we realize in the end that we aren’t abandoned by the Gods, but we are walking with them still, just on a different plane. We are never alone. We have moments of bliss, and others of boredom. But they are there. And our journey will only enlighten us further.

Eirene kai Hugieia!
(Peace and Health!)
Oracle